- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Hey peeps...I will start an Official Blog Site exclusive for my days in Japan. it's at http://dunstopdreaming.blogspot.com so do drop by there if you want any updates on me when I am in Japan. Well this site will still be around with my usual obnoxious rants about everything and anything, straight unfiltered.
So if you want a little smoothing on the eyes and mind, visit my other blog, incorporated purely for Japan Days.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Friday, July 20, 2007
It's CONFIRMED!
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
As of 3.21pm, July 2007, I am going to JAPAN. my position there is CONFIRMED! I will be going there to work. It's a 1 year contract thingy but I'll probably be there for more than a year...well u people noe me. I am a sucker for Japan and this chance that GOD have given me implies that I have to fulfill my dream.
I am speechless now, overwhelmed with anxiety and totally clueless about this new direction that I am heading. Yeah it's was a dream all this while but now that it actually came true I am really lost.
Anyway I will probably try to update so that everyone's post on what's going on.
As of 3.21pm, July 2007, I am going to JAPAN. my position there is CONFIRMED! I will be going there to work. It's a 1 year contract thingy but I'll probably be there for more than a year...well u people noe me. I am a sucker for Japan and this chance that GOD have given me implies that I have to fulfill my dream.
I am speechless now, overwhelmed with anxiety and totally clueless about this new direction that I am heading. Yeah it's was a dream all this while but now that it actually came true I am really lost.
Anyway I will probably try to update so that everyone's post on what's going on.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Shed some light...some hope and some faith
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Aniticipation, luck and maybe faith...well since Momo's departure, my obsession with Japanese have developed into a final stage tumor. This desperation have driven me to surpass my own cerebral concentration that seeks to find the optimum remedy.
Sending out tons and tons of emails to various schools on the net to land myself a job in Japan. Gloom from the start but the goal was clear...so had a couple of replies but mostly were negative. And then got 2 positive ones and I got in touch with one of them. This one looks promising yet I am not putting my last dollar on it...always expect the unexpected. Had a conversation with someone via phone last week and she was pretty surprised at my accent and my command of the language. Found out that outta 100+ applicants who applied for the job, I was 1 of the 10 shortlisted candidates.
Well, she claimed she liked my attitude and stuffs and she said she would strongly recommend me...*wink* tat's a consolation I'd guess. So haven't got any reply from her since I wired her my university's result. Got pretty paranoid so sent her a email on Monday and well, was almost gonna call her today but she replied today with these excerpts,
"We are still thinking ALT final decision.
I recomend you very much, but just two Japanese teachers hope someone has English teaching experience over one year.
Can you wait for a littlebit more?
I am sure I can tell you the result soon.
How much can you understand Japanese?
And Do you think if you teach at both of the Junior high and elementary school, is it all right?
The elementary school which this ALT teacher goes, is resistered as a model English School this time.
So it is very important work.
Maybe I will ask you to call me again soon."
Now not to get all my hopes high, but that's simply a glimmer of hope to my otherwise "GTO" wannabe dreams. Ha..WHOOOOOOOOO...way to go!!!!
Another reason for being rather paranoid is that I have to confirm the airline tixs for my scheduled Japan Backpacking Tour (JPT) in Dec. Initially was gonna get everything settled with Jireh but he's back in Aussie. Since he's equally as earnest as me to visit "Paradise" Japan, I fell obligated to resolve all issues before he comes back here in Nov. Well, he's like really in to this tour thingy and I have to fail him not.
God's workings probably be weaving magic for me if all goes smooth. This morning was greeted by a heavy downpour which drenched my rain jacket, my pants and my bag. I have never felt better. SOAKED on the outside, yet warmth embraced my heart and my love for the rain's even more now. Was freezing my ass wrapped in drenched pants working from morning till noon and I say I haven't felt better in years. GOD I LOVE RAINY DAYS!
Seriously it's like the first time the rain soaked my rain jacket. Had a nice pair of Timberlands from Japan to keep my feet dry and the Carhartt jac to keep my shirts dry. Now it's just missing out on the pants part so would probably invest in a pair of Burton's snowboarding pants (Thighs warmers included!).
So here's the inconsistent rants...fun in the rain, pun in the sun!
Aniticipation, luck and maybe faith...well since Momo's departure, my obsession with Japanese have developed into a final stage tumor. This desperation have driven me to surpass my own cerebral concentration that seeks to find the optimum remedy.
Sending out tons and tons of emails to various schools on the net to land myself a job in Japan. Gloom from the start but the goal was clear...so had a couple of replies but mostly were negative. And then got 2 positive ones and I got in touch with one of them. This one looks promising yet I am not putting my last dollar on it...always expect the unexpected. Had a conversation with someone via phone last week and she was pretty surprised at my accent and my command of the language. Found out that outta 100+ applicants who applied for the job, I was 1 of the 10 shortlisted candidates.
Well, she claimed she liked my attitude and stuffs and she said she would strongly recommend me...*wink* tat's a consolation I'd guess. So haven't got any reply from her since I wired her my university's result. Got pretty paranoid so sent her a email on Monday and well, was almost gonna call her today but she replied today with these excerpts,
"We are still thinking ALT final decision.
I recomend you very much, but just two Japanese teachers hope someone has English teaching experience over one year.
Can you wait for a littlebit more?
I am sure I can tell you the result soon.
How much can you understand Japanese?
And Do you think if you teach at both of the Junior high and elementary school, is it all right?
The elementary school which this ALT teacher goes, is resistered as a model English School this time.
So it is very important work.
Maybe I will ask you to call me again soon."
Now not to get all my hopes high, but that's simply a glimmer of hope to my otherwise "GTO" wannabe dreams. Ha..WHOOOOOOOOO...way to go!!!!
Another reason for being rather paranoid is that I have to confirm the airline tixs for my scheduled Japan Backpacking Tour (JPT) in Dec. Initially was gonna get everything settled with Jireh but he's back in Aussie. Since he's equally as earnest as me to visit "Paradise" Japan, I fell obligated to resolve all issues before he comes back here in Nov. Well, he's like really in to this tour thingy and I have to fail him not.
God's workings probably be weaving magic for me if all goes smooth. This morning was greeted by a heavy downpour which drenched my rain jacket, my pants and my bag. I have never felt better. SOAKED on the outside, yet warmth embraced my heart and my love for the rain's even more now. Was freezing my ass wrapped in drenched pants working from morning till noon and I say I haven't felt better in years. GOD I LOVE RAINY DAYS!
Seriously it's like the first time the rain soaked my rain jacket. Had a nice pair of Timberlands from Japan to keep my feet dry and the Carhartt jac to keep my shirts dry. Now it's just missing out on the pants part so would probably invest in a pair of Burton's snowboarding pants (Thighs warmers included!).
So here's the inconsistent rants...fun in the rain, pun in the sun!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Songs and yes these voices of angels that seems to have miraculous effects, bringing tears, memories and joy. Right now happen to be grooving to songs that have splendid lyrics, fantastic tunes and meaningful stories. Not in the mood to spin too much but anyway here's the list:
1. Never let you go - Janice
2. Would you be there - Ken Chong
3. 变换装束 - Wax
3. Still - Crystal Kay
4. Goodbye days - Yui
5. Love is... - Miliyah Kato
6. Love Story - melody.
7. Because I'm a girl - Kiss
8. Don't cry - Naked
9. Goodbye - Janice
10. First Love - Utada Hikaru
11. Let me die - Nicholas Tse
Work is pretty boring these days as there is nothing much left to do in the office. Boss pops by once in a while since he's on leave and I'm still contemplating if I can get the job in Japan. Got selected amongst 100 entries to teach English in Japan. Was talking to Kakegawa San over the phone and she said something like they are not really looking for someone really experience but rather someone with positive and fun. Well she wanted me to fly to Japan for an interview but I told her I can't as I got a full time job here. Well I am not really sure if the conversation over that long distance call was worth it. I am just keeping my fingers crossed and hope that I'd get the job. Trust me...I am on one hell of a path, plotting and scheming with every nerve and cell in my still-functioning body to land my ass in Japan and work there. The obsession used to root into my central vertebrate complete overriding my cerebral senses. Now it's just a full fledge 3 stage tumor that can never be remove...it's as good as putting a bullet thru my head if the tumor is to be removed. I have chosen amongst all odds and options and it's this path...there is no wrong about it. Yeah it will be tough initially but what isn't...
Amongst all others that I might feel a little reluctant to forsake, my parents, my friends, and probably you Eve...who have stood by myside all these while without a slightest complain. Thank You...
That is IF.....and IF I do get the job. Can't really do much on this one as luck is definitely not within my control and perhaps God's will...
Songs and yes these voices of angels that seems to have miraculous effects, bringing tears, memories and joy. Right now happen to be grooving to songs that have splendid lyrics, fantastic tunes and meaningful stories. Not in the mood to spin too much but anyway here's the list:
1. Never let you go - Janice
2. Would you be there - Ken Chong
3. 变换装束 - Wax
3. Still - Crystal Kay
4. Goodbye days - Yui
5. Love is... - Miliyah Kato
6. Love Story - melody.
7. Because I'm a girl - Kiss
8. Don't cry - Naked
9. Goodbye - Janice
10. First Love - Utada Hikaru
11. Let me die - Nicholas Tse
Work is pretty boring these days as there is nothing much left to do in the office. Boss pops by once in a while since he's on leave and I'm still contemplating if I can get the job in Japan. Got selected amongst 100 entries to teach English in Japan. Was talking to Kakegawa San over the phone and she said something like they are not really looking for someone really experience but rather someone with positive and fun. Well she wanted me to fly to Japan for an interview but I told her I can't as I got a full time job here. Well I am not really sure if the conversation over that long distance call was worth it. I am just keeping my fingers crossed and hope that I'd get the job. Trust me...I am on one hell of a path, plotting and scheming with every nerve and cell in my still-functioning body to land my ass in Japan and work there. The obsession used to root into my central vertebrate complete overriding my cerebral senses. Now it's just a full fledge 3 stage tumor that can never be remove...it's as good as putting a bullet thru my head if the tumor is to be removed. I have chosen amongst all odds and options and it's this path...there is no wrong about it. Yeah it will be tough initially but what isn't...
Amongst all others that I might feel a little reluctant to forsake, my parents, my friends, and probably you Eve...who have stood by myside all these while without a slightest complain. Thank You...
That is IF.....and IF I do get the job. Can't really do much on this one as luck is definitely not within my control and perhaps God's will...
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Traffic Police New Toy - Unmarked Yamaha FJR1300
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Well this might be a little late but stumbling over someone's blog this morning had me scruffling to get these pics up...
Yep these mean menacing wolves are out on the prowl. Rumours has it that these are out there chewing on tails off any illegally-mod cars, bikes, etc. Other rumours claim that they will be used for VIP related stuffs. Well nothing have been confirmed so to err on the right side of the law and to salvage the limited wad of notes in out pockets, better be on the look out for these new TOYS.
FJR1300...means a FUCKING 1.3 litre engine bike and that's almost equivalent to a Hayabusa. Man...that's where the tax payers' money is going! To rake in more "innocent" money from us poor folks...Ha guess like the GST bonus package indeed have a "recurring" effect as year after year, those crucial couple of months before NDP is like mass genocide. Innocent folks get their hard-earned money "robbed" and back it goes to those up there.
These dangerous couple of months are like a insane bloodbath so the best way is to share the ride on a public trnasport. Unless money is not an issue, I probably would not want to risk my Japan Tour Funds for any other ridiculous reasons.
Well this might be a little late but stumbling over someone's blog this morning had me scruffling to get these pics up...
Yep these mean menacing wolves are out on the prowl. Rumours has it that these are out there chewing on tails off any illegally-mod cars, bikes, etc. Other rumours claim that they will be used for VIP related stuffs. Well nothing have been confirmed so to err on the right side of the law and to salvage the limited wad of notes in out pockets, better be on the look out for these new TOYS.
FJR1300...means a FUCKING 1.3 litre engine bike and that's almost equivalent to a Hayabusa. Man...that's where the tax payers' money is going! To rake in more "innocent" money from us poor folks...Ha guess like the GST bonus package indeed have a "recurring" effect as year after year, those crucial couple of months before NDP is like mass genocide. Innocent folks get their hard-earned money "robbed" and back it goes to those up there.
These dangerous couple of months are like a insane bloodbath so the best way is to share the ride on a public trnasport. Unless money is not an issue, I probably would not want to risk my Japan Tour Funds for any other ridiculous reasons.
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Dust clouds my incompetent mind
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
In the past, well I would usually be courteous and give way to others, give up my seats to someone who needs it more than I do. That's alrite because I was happy, I had the world held up so real and so promising in front of me. I had actually believe that everything was going so smoothly and I was practically floating on a cushion of dreams that sort of "immunizes" me against anything negative.
Yesterday and today was a totally different reflection of my otherwise "complete" and positive outlook of life. I chose to stare rather than to smile and appreciate. In the trains, those who have worn frail with the hands of time hoping for a kind soul to offer a seat, I chose to stare them right in the eye with the slightest displeasure than to offer the seat. Even those with young infants in their hands, slogging thru the masses of bodies were not spared. I chose to simply stare them in the eyes showing disgust and sacarsm thru the exchanges of eye contact.
No I do not have a death wish sub consciously but rather, I wasn't motivated to do anything. I can't rationalize and evaluate the situations effectively. When a mere thought of offering my seat came to mind, it just move on and the next thing I know, I was staring into space and admiring the emptiness admist the crowd wondering what had just flashed across my mind. My reflexes and agility have greatly be incapacitated and yet I remain calm and my body remains stable.
Yesterday on the way home, the train suddenly halted just after leaving a station and people around me who were not holding on to something stable just crash and fall. I merely took one step to stabilize myself and I continued to groove to the music churning out from my PSP without the slightest interest in the cause of the sudden halt. Well, seems like everyone around me both inside and outside the train were all too concern with what's going on. Silly me stoned there like a rooted ancient tree still staring into emptiness. After the commotion was over, the masses attention turned to me...though I was enjoying the emptiness, I could sense the occasional glares from those around me as though I am some freak that spawn from undergound. Well, I was really too busy enjoying the silence to be bothered by them.
Still I have to say the lost of Momo have really cause a life-changing transitional road that I am treading now. I can't seem to find my existence and my goals, I can't seem to find myself and my soul. Still I life each day like it is and go to work as usual and simply blending into the crowd. But beneath this hollow shell of mine, I really am not sure what I have become. With her around, there was life to everything but the day she left, she took everything with her.
No I am definitely not suicidal and that never crossed my mind but regaining my composure and finding myself once again is an ardous journey. Well at least she's happy and I am not.
For now, I guessed I'd just have to believe myself and do what I deem fit. I shall let selfish and self centred cognition have complete control over my mind for even my really really close brother, yes he's my REAL brother, flying off this Thursday to Australia would see me skip the set off at the airport. Simply I gave the excuse that I don't like sad farewells to musk the real truth that I am simply not bothered with anything else except myself.
In the past, well I would usually be courteous and give way to others, give up my seats to someone who needs it more than I do. That's alrite because I was happy, I had the world held up so real and so promising in front of me. I had actually believe that everything was going so smoothly and I was practically floating on a cushion of dreams that sort of "immunizes" me against anything negative.
Yesterday and today was a totally different reflection of my otherwise "complete" and positive outlook of life. I chose to stare rather than to smile and appreciate. In the trains, those who have worn frail with the hands of time hoping for a kind soul to offer a seat, I chose to stare them right in the eye with the slightest displeasure than to offer the seat. Even those with young infants in their hands, slogging thru the masses of bodies were not spared. I chose to simply stare them in the eyes showing disgust and sacarsm thru the exchanges of eye contact.
No I do not have a death wish sub consciously but rather, I wasn't motivated to do anything. I can't rationalize and evaluate the situations effectively. When a mere thought of offering my seat came to mind, it just move on and the next thing I know, I was staring into space and admiring the emptiness admist the crowd wondering what had just flashed across my mind. My reflexes and agility have greatly be incapacitated and yet I remain calm and my body remains stable.
Yesterday on the way home, the train suddenly halted just after leaving a station and people around me who were not holding on to something stable just crash and fall. I merely took one step to stabilize myself and I continued to groove to the music churning out from my PSP without the slightest interest in the cause of the sudden halt. Well, seems like everyone around me both inside and outside the train were all too concern with what's going on. Silly me stoned there like a rooted ancient tree still staring into emptiness. After the commotion was over, the masses attention turned to me...though I was enjoying the emptiness, I could sense the occasional glares from those around me as though I am some freak that spawn from undergound. Well, I was really too busy enjoying the silence to be bothered by them.
Still I have to say the lost of Momo have really cause a life-changing transitional road that I am treading now. I can't seem to find my existence and my goals, I can't seem to find myself and my soul. Still I life each day like it is and go to work as usual and simply blending into the crowd. But beneath this hollow shell of mine, I really am not sure what I have become. With her around, there was life to everything but the day she left, she took everything with her.
No I am definitely not suicidal and that never crossed my mind but regaining my composure and finding myself once again is an ardous journey. Well at least she's happy and I am not.
For now, I guessed I'd just have to believe myself and do what I deem fit. I shall let selfish and self centred cognition have complete control over my mind for even my really really close brother, yes he's my REAL brother, flying off this Thursday to Australia would see me skip the set off at the airport. Simply I gave the excuse that I don't like sad farewells to musk the real truth that I am simply not bothered with anything else except myself.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Darkness sets in...
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Seems like I am still struggling to get a grip on my life and each day, I am sinking deeper into a void darkness. Even my designs are twisted, warped and distorted to please my displaced and disturbed sanity. God, tell me what have I done to have so much hatred and angst to engulf me and deny salvation. I do not and will not seek forgiveness, instead, I'd guess I will just have to go forth and complete what I had initially set out to do.
I shall conscript this piece, "Rage against the dying flame"
Seems like I am still struggling to get a grip on my life and each day, I am sinking deeper into a void darkness. Even my designs are twisted, warped and distorted to please my displaced and disturbed sanity. God, tell me what have I done to have so much hatred and angst to engulf me and deny salvation. I do not and will not seek forgiveness, instead, I'd guess I will just have to go forth and complete what I had initially set out to do.
I shall conscript this piece, "Rage against the dying flame"
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