- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Couple of weeks ago, I had beaten everyone else at the Go Kart challenge organise by my company along with some other industry players. My Boss got his ass whipped real bad by me and after the whole incident, he was like praising me in front of the other industry players about how I held the company's reputation.
After that, my Boss, me and some of my colleagues took a cab ride to East Coast for dinner. Along the way, he was saying that the kart he got had problems with the brakes and I told him mine had NO FUCKING brakes. Well he simply tried to pull it off by saying that he had actually lost and did not want to blame the kart or anything. I had an impression that well he did have some sportsmanship after all.
I was so FUCKING WRONG. He turned out to be the slittery, devious FUCKING SHITHOLE that actually wanted me to put up some news online that I had actually cheated to win the race. I mean WHAT THE FUCK?! Admit it that you've lost and that's it...cos no matter how many times you pit a go kart against me, you'll still lose. I am really really irritated by how he held this grudge against me all this while. FUCK!
I had 8 years of street racing experience and him? Probably 2 years of controller wanking shits up his ass and fancy him pitting himself against me. Ha what a FUCKING joke! But it's really unimaginable for him, as a Boss to stoop so low to slander his own very employee just to uphold his ego. FUCK YOU SHIT HOLE...that ain't gonna happen. Well he put me in charge of the online issues so I can tweak the sentences to make it all justifiable. I am not amazingly smart but at least I cant just let some AUSTRALIAN shit hole tarnish my racing reputation.
FUCK OFF SHIT HOLE!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Friday, June 22, 2007
Regrets...
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Since the day you left, I've been moving on rather fine I'd guess or is it me that is denying the fact that you've already left? I am really not sure...I do question myself time and again if I am really moving on. But at the end of the day, the only conclusion that I can draw is that I am just walking in your shadows, can't move out of it as when ever there is light, a shadow would be cast. Unless I can rid the prescence of light in my life, there is absolutely no way I can ever walk out of this labyrinth that you have inevitably trapped me.
I still think of you and all the memories we shared time and again as the wounds are less than a month old. But each time I would still smile when I see you so clearly in my mind. Well to tell you the truth, I reminded myself every nite before I rest that I can never stop till I reach the end. The proccess is not important but it's the results that matter. If it's not you that I can share my life with, I am darn sure it's someone else waiting for me to find her. It's just that I am only left with 2 or 3 years maximum to find her. While you were here, I had already cast aside the intention to seek another soul mate but since your departure, I had to start from scratch and for that I kinda felt a sense of unjust done to me. The burden is there once again...
Right now I have so many regrets awaiting redemption...love songs on the radio waves and lovers all around me disgust me each day as I can not enjoy such pleasures and sweetness in life. From that I begin to hate a lot of things around me, from people to things to life. Simply, I just put on a mask and joke and smile and fool around others only to have my heart telling me that I should remember my friends but I should NEVER EVER FORGET those that wreck my life. Probably will stare them in the eyes when I die...so that they will forever be instilled with fear, pricking their conscience where ever they may be.
With your departure, life's seems to be better for you as you have cleared a burden and it seems to me that you are the least affected by the break up. I am utterly disappointed simply because I was just wondering where and of what significance am I to you?
I put you as my No. 1
I life my life and breath to see you each day
I am willing to do almost anything within my limits for you
I am willing to share everything with you
I am willing to grow old together with you
I work hard just to fulfil our dreams
I think of you before I think of myself
I can fall out with the whole world for you
I made you the centre of my life
I look up to you as a savior and a saint
I adore and worship you
and I was just wondering where would you put me in your life?
You'd probably say that I did all these things out of my own accord and you absolutely played no part in it. That's simply your own selfish excuses to deny it.
Although it's partially true, still that;s just your selfish, self centred excuses to justtify your own cause.
Right now I may be regretting over your departure but someday I will show you that it's definitely your loss that you gave me up. I will do more that I did for you for someone else. And when that time comes, I would really want you to regret all that you have done, your decisions, you choices, your life...I just want you to regret everything and have that guilt tormenting you forever.
Since the day you left, I've been moving on rather fine I'd guess or is it me that is denying the fact that you've already left? I am really not sure...I do question myself time and again if I am really moving on. But at the end of the day, the only conclusion that I can draw is that I am just walking in your shadows, can't move out of it as when ever there is light, a shadow would be cast. Unless I can rid the prescence of light in my life, there is absolutely no way I can ever walk out of this labyrinth that you have inevitably trapped me.
I still think of you and all the memories we shared time and again as the wounds are less than a month old. But each time I would still smile when I see you so clearly in my mind. Well to tell you the truth, I reminded myself every nite before I rest that I can never stop till I reach the end. The proccess is not important but it's the results that matter. If it's not you that I can share my life with, I am darn sure it's someone else waiting for me to find her. It's just that I am only left with 2 or 3 years maximum to find her. While you were here, I had already cast aside the intention to seek another soul mate but since your departure, I had to start from scratch and for that I kinda felt a sense of unjust done to me. The burden is there once again...
Right now I have so many regrets awaiting redemption...love songs on the radio waves and lovers all around me disgust me each day as I can not enjoy such pleasures and sweetness in life. From that I begin to hate a lot of things around me, from people to things to life. Simply, I just put on a mask and joke and smile and fool around others only to have my heart telling me that I should remember my friends but I should NEVER EVER FORGET those that wreck my life. Probably will stare them in the eyes when I die...so that they will forever be instilled with fear, pricking their conscience where ever they may be.
With your departure, life's seems to be better for you as you have cleared a burden and it seems to me that you are the least affected by the break up. I am utterly disappointed simply because I was just wondering where and of what significance am I to you?
I put you as my No. 1
I life my life and breath to see you each day
I am willing to do almost anything within my limits for you
I am willing to share everything with you
I am willing to grow old together with you
I work hard just to fulfil our dreams
I think of you before I think of myself
I can fall out with the whole world for you
I made you the centre of my life
I look up to you as a savior and a saint
I adore and worship you
and I was just wondering where would you put me in your life?
You'd probably say that I did all these things out of my own accord and you absolutely played no part in it. That's simply your own selfish excuses to deny it.
Although it's partially true, still that;s just your selfish, self centred excuses to justtify your own cause.
Right now I may be regretting over your departure but someday I will show you that it's definitely your loss that you gave me up. I will do more that I did for you for someone else. And when that time comes, I would really want you to regret all that you have done, your decisions, you choices, your life...I just want you to regret everything and have that guilt tormenting you forever.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Once lovers and now strangers...
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Yesterday, on my way home...was on board the west bound MRT. Didn't really bothered with what's going on around me as my bag was darn heavy. Loaded of like couple of boxes of games from the office. Felt like army days have gone to waste after idling all these while. Look more like a lost backpacker looking for directions.
Got a seat and rested the "commuter-killer" bag on my lap and PSPed away...until almost reaching Jurong station, I let my PSPed-Strained eyes wander around. Caught a tall girl look in my direction. She was my ex-GF. The one that broke my heart and left me to rot and die. It seems so strange but somehow the vivid memories came back. I felt like in a transitional dimension having lots of crossroads in front of me and I had to choose which direction to take. I smiled at her and nodded my head in an agreeable gesture and she did the same thing.
Once embracing each other so dearly leaving the world behind in reality. Doing so many crazy things for each other, missing each other so dearly and meeting 12 hours a day never seems enoungh. Every minute every second counts and vows, promises were made with such sweetness that will put others to shame. Hand in hand, dooing everything together and now, not even words are exchanged, just plain gestures to affirm each others' existence. From strangers to lovers and then back to strangers. All the memories, love and times shared seem to be nothing more than just vague, old and redundant history of yester years. Nothing more than a childish dream filled with empty promises.
Love works in such strange ways that most of the time, a beginning will inevitable spells the end which will cycle to a new beginning. It's all part of life and everyone will just have to go thru it if they seek love. But the thing is that lovers seems impossible to be close friends or even platonic friends when they break up. Tons of possibilities here...but what ever the case is, it seems to me that if you have a friend, as long as you do not step into a relationship with them, you will probably get a life long friend who would probably lay you a flower on your deathbed. If you should start a relationship, it's always sweet in the beginning but when the inevitable end should come, you'd probably lose a friend and wished that you'd not started the relationship in the beginning.
Yesterday, on my way home...was on board the west bound MRT. Didn't really bothered with what's going on around me as my bag was darn heavy. Loaded of like couple of boxes of games from the office. Felt like army days have gone to waste after idling all these while. Look more like a lost backpacker looking for directions.
Got a seat and rested the "commuter-killer" bag on my lap and PSPed away...until almost reaching Jurong station, I let my PSPed-Strained eyes wander around. Caught a tall girl look in my direction. She was my ex-GF. The one that broke my heart and left me to rot and die. It seems so strange but somehow the vivid memories came back. I felt like in a transitional dimension having lots of crossroads in front of me and I had to choose which direction to take. I smiled at her and nodded my head in an agreeable gesture and she did the same thing.
Once embracing each other so dearly leaving the world behind in reality. Doing so many crazy things for each other, missing each other so dearly and meeting 12 hours a day never seems enoungh. Every minute every second counts and vows, promises were made with such sweetness that will put others to shame. Hand in hand, dooing everything together and now, not even words are exchanged, just plain gestures to affirm each others' existence. From strangers to lovers and then back to strangers. All the memories, love and times shared seem to be nothing more than just vague, old and redundant history of yester years. Nothing more than a childish dream filled with empty promises.
Love works in such strange ways that most of the time, a beginning will inevitable spells the end which will cycle to a new beginning. It's all part of life and everyone will just have to go thru it if they seek love. But the thing is that lovers seems impossible to be close friends or even platonic friends when they break up. Tons of possibilities here...but what ever the case is, it seems to me that if you have a friend, as long as you do not step into a relationship with them, you will probably get a life long friend who would probably lay you a flower on your deathbed. If you should start a relationship, it's always sweet in the beginning but when the inevitable end should come, you'd probably lose a friend and wished that you'd not started the relationship in the beginning.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
My Eternal Angel
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
I remembered the day I held your hand
You smiled at me and
I knew this was where our story began
You brought me out of darkness
taught me to love and to forgive
You became my savior
my angel and my life
I begin to trust faith
and I begin to trust you
Thru the ups and the downs
Across oceans and over mountains
It's your love kept me warm and
our memories kept me alive
I go on waiting each and every day
to be reunited with you someday
I really regret not loving you more
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
Now that you've decided
to end our fairy tale
There is nothing I can do
And I know this was really the end
I will remember the day we parted
But I will never forget the day we started
A million years from now
I will still be thinking of you
My visions may go and
my hair will gray
But my memories will never fade
Cigarettes and alcohol are my friends
drowning me in sorrowful nites
I walk alone in empty streets
wondering what are you doing
how are you and if it's me you're thinking
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
Baby would you lay me a flower
and play my favourite song
Baby would you shed me a tear
and clean the dust on my photo
when I am sleeping in a wooden box
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
- My Eternal Angel -
I remembered the day I held your hand
You smiled at me and
I knew this was where our story began
You brought me out of darkness
taught me to love and to forgive
You became my savior
my angel and my life
I begin to trust faith
and I begin to trust you
Thru the ups and the downs
Across oceans and over mountains
It's your love kept me warm and
our memories kept me alive
I go on waiting each and every day
to be reunited with you someday
I really regret not loving you more
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
Now that you've decided
to end our fairy tale
There is nothing I can do
And I know this was really the end
I will remember the day we parted
But I will never forget the day we started
A million years from now
I will still be thinking of you
My visions may go and
my hair will gray
But my memories will never fade
Cigarettes and alcohol are my friends
drowning me in sorrowful nites
I walk alone in empty streets
wondering what are you doing
how are you and if it's me you're thinking
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
Baby would you lay me a flower
and play my favourite song
Baby would you shed me a tear
and clean the dust on my photo
when I am sleeping in a wooden box
Goodbye my eternal angel
for the time has come for us to part
Baby Can I still love you
when you have somebody
Can I still miss you
when you're thinking of somebody
Can I still remember you
when I feel lonely
And would you come to see me if I die
- My Eternal Angel -
A little consolation to tranquilize the mind
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Yesterday, my company had a Go-Kart challenge at Jurong along with one of my colleague, Chad Park, from Korea and 3 other staffs of the magazine, GameAxis and 1 other dude who is the official distributor of Nintendo in Singapore. Well the place was like in a pretty bad shape...and the tracks were small and WET! I was like FUCKED!
10 people total splited into 2 groups and the schedule were as follows, group A go for a 5 min warm up lap, then group B go for the 5 min warm up lap. The A go for a 5 min trial run and then B. The 5 fastest split times were recorded and these 5 racers go for the last 10 laps race where no assistance will be given if one should crash.
I let the "Pro" racers take group A and watch them pit against themselves. From there I observed the way they drive, accelerate, brake and the way they tackle corners. I hid myself among group B which consists mainly amatuers and noobz. I tried to test the acceleration, turning radius, braking power, handling of the kart. Along the way I observe the track, the corners and try to find the perfect driving line.
"Pro racers from Group A"
"I'll tell ya those boys don't mean nothing so go kick their sorry asses"
Crash out a couple of times while testing the potential of the kart in the warm up lap. Hit the dirt, over drifted and ate grasses. When the trial lap came, I was already trying hard to compromise drifting and maintaining the split time. However, I spent too much time enjoying the drift, I soon realise that that's not the fastest way to get around the corner on a kart. A little drift is fine for tight corners but that's about it. Soon I got used to the FULL accelerate and HARD braking before the corners and the FULL accelerate power out of corners was like the optimal driving line. I didn't really recorded the fastest split times and I tried to mask my driving technique when I was nearing the grand stand as I really didn't want others to judge my skills and besides I really didn't give my 110% on the trial laps.
"Group A races pitting it out"
"The second straight before the last bend"
Well, by this time, most of them have already had mud splats and grasses on their shirts and pants. I was the ONLY one that's clean, well maybe because I was too afraid to get my prize possessions like my shoes and pants soiled.
So since my timing was like the 4th fastest overall, watching how the others perform, I knew I had no way to beat them if they had a good run from the start. I wasn't saying that I had the best skillz there and not that I am playing humble, but the truth is that I could pass them if they crash out or if them made mistakes but I wasn't taking any chances. 3 karts in from of me on the starting grid, and Momo, my Japanese Gal left me on Monday. In my mind was angst, and rage and now I will focus and harness all of these elements to win. Losing was not an option. Life is transient and this would be the only chance to get a consolation outta it.
The marshal was giving a 5 second explaination on the grid and in my mind, that 5 sec seems like forever as I could clearly devise a plan and see it rationalize into reality. I needed a head start and the only way I could do it was to jam the brakes and yet accelerate till the point that the kart held stationary by the brakes and that the instance I release my brakes, the kart would lunge forward giving me a head start as everyone else would just floor the accelerator and their karts would just move off as usual.
I was FUCKING right, the moment the flag was raised, I was already overtaking 2 karts in front of me putting me in 2nd place and negotiating a gradual right bend behind my Boss. But due to the fact that I was travelling behind him and he was way too slow for my speed and I do not want to brake on the straights, I just overtook him and took the inner of the next right-angled right bend and there I was being in 1st place. I knew I had to hold on to my lead and yet extend the gap every lap and also not make any mistakes. That was the only way I would win and I ain't gonna let no mistakes or what-so-ever jeopardise it.
Was losing it during the 3rd or 4th lap when I actually over drifted on the tight hair pins. Thank God my lead was like 30 secs ahead of the second car so I actually had ample time to correct my mistakes. I totally free myself of any distractions after that and all that in my mind was the accelerated vision of my path to victory. I guess this is like the first official race I had without the constant fear of cops and that's the reason why I was making mistakes.
During the last couple of laps, I was actually trying to overtake my colleague who was a lap behind me. Damn he was an ASS blocking me in every possible chance to pass him. I tried going thru the water puddles, the grass benders and all other possible way, no luck. So I decided to play mind games with him and tailed him so close and yet not pass him...soon enuff, he totally screwed it and spun out. I twitched my wrists a little and whizz passed him on full throttle missing him by inches.
Held on to my lead all the way and pass the checked flag, did a "hand brake" turn in to the stop area, remove my helmet and waited for the rest to come.
A little consolation for that time but it didn't last long. The past came back and haunt me soon enuff. I can't walk outta of her shadows but I remembered the words that my Korean colleague tattooed on Monday, "Life goes on until death overtakes me"
Yesterday, my company had a Go-Kart challenge at Jurong along with one of my colleague, Chad Park, from Korea and 3 other staffs of the magazine, GameAxis and 1 other dude who is the official distributor of Nintendo in Singapore. Well the place was like in a pretty bad shape...and the tracks were small and WET! I was like FUCKED!
10 people total splited into 2 groups and the schedule were as follows, group A go for a 5 min warm up lap, then group B go for the 5 min warm up lap. The A go for a 5 min trial run and then B. The 5 fastest split times were recorded and these 5 racers go for the last 10 laps race where no assistance will be given if one should crash.
I let the "Pro" racers take group A and watch them pit against themselves. From there I observed the way they drive, accelerate, brake and the way they tackle corners. I hid myself among group B which consists mainly amatuers and noobz. I tried to test the acceleration, turning radius, braking power, handling of the kart. Along the way I observe the track, the corners and try to find the perfect driving line.
"Pro racers from Group A"
"I'll tell ya those boys don't mean nothing so go kick their sorry asses"
Crash out a couple of times while testing the potential of the kart in the warm up lap. Hit the dirt, over drifted and ate grasses. When the trial lap came, I was already trying hard to compromise drifting and maintaining the split time. However, I spent too much time enjoying the drift, I soon realise that that's not the fastest way to get around the corner on a kart. A little drift is fine for tight corners but that's about it. Soon I got used to the FULL accelerate and HARD braking before the corners and the FULL accelerate power out of corners was like the optimal driving line. I didn't really recorded the fastest split times and I tried to mask my driving technique when I was nearing the grand stand as I really didn't want others to judge my skills and besides I really didn't give my 110% on the trial laps.
"Group A races pitting it out"
"The second straight before the last bend"
Well, by this time, most of them have already had mud splats and grasses on their shirts and pants. I was the ONLY one that's clean, well maybe because I was too afraid to get my prize possessions like my shoes and pants soiled.
So since my timing was like the 4th fastest overall, watching how the others perform, I knew I had no way to beat them if they had a good run from the start. I wasn't saying that I had the best skillz there and not that I am playing humble, but the truth is that I could pass them if they crash out or if them made mistakes but I wasn't taking any chances. 3 karts in from of me on the starting grid, and Momo, my Japanese Gal left me on Monday. In my mind was angst, and rage and now I will focus and harness all of these elements to win. Losing was not an option. Life is transient and this would be the only chance to get a consolation outta it.
The marshal was giving a 5 second explaination on the grid and in my mind, that 5 sec seems like forever as I could clearly devise a plan and see it rationalize into reality. I needed a head start and the only way I could do it was to jam the brakes and yet accelerate till the point that the kart held stationary by the brakes and that the instance I release my brakes, the kart would lunge forward giving me a head start as everyone else would just floor the accelerator and their karts would just move off as usual.
I was FUCKING right, the moment the flag was raised, I was already overtaking 2 karts in front of me putting me in 2nd place and negotiating a gradual right bend behind my Boss. But due to the fact that I was travelling behind him and he was way too slow for my speed and I do not want to brake on the straights, I just overtook him and took the inner of the next right-angled right bend and there I was being in 1st place. I knew I had to hold on to my lead and yet extend the gap every lap and also not make any mistakes. That was the only way I would win and I ain't gonna let no mistakes or what-so-ever jeopardise it.
Was losing it during the 3rd or 4th lap when I actually over drifted on the tight hair pins. Thank God my lead was like 30 secs ahead of the second car so I actually had ample time to correct my mistakes. I totally free myself of any distractions after that and all that in my mind was the accelerated vision of my path to victory. I guess this is like the first official race I had without the constant fear of cops and that's the reason why I was making mistakes.
During the last couple of laps, I was actually trying to overtake my colleague who was a lap behind me. Damn he was an ASS blocking me in every possible chance to pass him. I tried going thru the water puddles, the grass benders and all other possible way, no luck. So I decided to play mind games with him and tailed him so close and yet not pass him...soon enuff, he totally screwed it and spun out. I twitched my wrists a little and whizz passed him on full throttle missing him by inches.
Held on to my lead all the way and pass the checked flag, did a "hand brake" turn in to the stop area, remove my helmet and waited for the rest to come.
A little consolation for that time but it didn't last long. The past came back and haunt me soon enuff. I can't walk outta of her shadows but I remembered the words that my Korean colleague tattooed on Monday, "Life goes on until death overtakes me"
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
The path to destruction
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
This is the first day after my sun died. Hopes and faith have become lies and never will I want to believe in until I hurt enuff people to die for my cause. This is my path to destruction...I will not make any vows or any commitments but I'd just do it...destroy as many lives and ruin as many things as I can.
I was on your leash to do to your abiding but now, I am on my own and no one can contain me. It's funny how Heavens rained today as if to drown me in tears. The weather was gloomy, the rained stopped but seems to be hanging around the corner for another round of tears.
And I am here, pitted by love that have turned terribly wrong and into hatred. Once again, I set out to pilfer, plunder, and raid so that the cycle of tormentation will continue.
Next stop Japan. I am bent to get there so there is no stopping me now. To leave a trail of destruction, to leave souls howling, and this is all for you. Thank you.
This is the first day after my sun died. Hopes and faith have become lies and never will I want to believe in until I hurt enuff people to die for my cause. This is my path to destruction...I will not make any vows or any commitments but I'd just do it...destroy as many lives and ruin as many things as I can.
I was on your leash to do to your abiding but now, I am on my own and no one can contain me. It's funny how Heavens rained today as if to drown me in tears. The weather was gloomy, the rained stopped but seems to be hanging around the corner for another round of tears.
And I am here, pitted by love that have turned terribly wrong and into hatred. Once again, I set out to pilfer, plunder, and raid so that the cycle of tormentation will continue.
Next stop Japan. I am bent to get there so there is no stopping me now. To leave a trail of destruction, to leave souls howling, and this is all for you. Thank you.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Today 11 June 2007...The End
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
My intuition was correct, each time when you said that you wanted me to call you, I just felt uneasy that each call I make would probably be my last...and today, you decided to end it all. There is really nothing more I can say...all the things we've gone thru, the times we shared and the hopes that kept me alive.
You were my savior, my soul, my pillar of support. Now that you are gone, once again I have to pick up the broken pieces by myself. One after another, you chose to leave like she does and yet each time, I am the only one left to pick up the broken pieces. I was a puppet on your string right from the start, I was a chess piece on your table, I was nothing more than a number to add to your stats.
I kept so much of you and all that is now just ashes washed away with the rain. I was always walking behind you and you just kept running. I was never able to do what I wanted for you are always leading. I have loved and now I am tormented and burned! I cannot choose to hate you for I chose this path myself...and in isolation I drown myself in my own despair.
It was never about me...it was always about you. Whatever I do never seems to be able to please you and whatever you did I have to just accept it. I have become and option to you and you have become my only existence to go on.
How you took me out from the shadows and how you showed me to forgive and forget and to live life new, REBIRTH. How you used to promise me so much things and I was only a sucker to believe in faith and hope and all other lies. Seperated by a million miles and across oceans, I live each day on faith and hope only to find myself being buried in my own illusions. I can say enuffs thank you for all that you have done and showed me and I can say enuff sorries to make up for all the sadness that I gave you. But the truth is that I have given everything I've got and I mean EVERYTHING, but in the end, nothing ever pleases you. You are up there looking down and I am always here looking up at my ray of hope.
You gave me a reason to submit and repent but now you gave me nothing more than just empty promises. The world around me bless us for being together that's because I made you the center of my life and my world just revolves around you. But ask yourself what did you do for me? You can be stubborn and argue your way through but the truth is that you can NEVER put me above everything else, for you are self-centred and it's only you that matter. You have a choice and no one really held a knife to hold you against your own will and you chose to give me up. That's really noble and liked you always said, how much do I really know about you. Well ask yourself, how much did you ever tell me? You never wanted to tell me anything and excuses after excuses you would give to justify everything. Excuses like I would never be able to help or make a difference, I would never understand...these are jsut your own excuses to cover yourself. You are just plain selfish and no one ever will ever fit your bill.
It's not like I never ask or cared but it's just you that never really wanted to share. You made your options and priorities right from the start and I was never on the list. I was a substitute, a pawn, a replacement, something that when you needed, I will be at your disposal and stashed away when not needed. Have you ever been fair? The answer is no...not because nothing in this world is fair but rather it's just your own self-centred thinking.
I am sorry that I robbed you of your freedom right from the start.
I am sorry that I became the root of all your problems.
I am sorry that I wasn't able to meet your standards.
I am sorry that I was becoming a burden to you
I am sorry that I wasn't of much help
I am sorry that I was a jerk at some point of time
I am sorry that I disappoint you
I am sorry that I made you my life
I am sorry that I can not make your dreams come true
For all the sorries that I have apologised to you, have you ever said sorry to me? Have you ever felt remorse for the things that you did? I have never initiated any disputes or quarrels all these while and each time it was just me who would apologise to you. What were you realy thinking all these while?
So many questions are left blank and so many answers I seek, you were in a dilemma and you chose to sacrifice me so you could please the world and you really think that would benefit the both of us? I think that would only benefit you...so go on please the FUCKING WORLD of yours and let me burn and die.
Though I can never seek the answers why would you please the FUCKING WORLD and sacrifice me, if it makes you happy and if these FUCKING PEOPLE are so GOD DAMN FUCKING important, then so be it. I really don't see them contributing to your sake in anyway and I have to near the FUCKING CONSEQUENCES of your decisions, I can only come to think that THESE FUCKING ASSHOLES ARE BETTER OFF DEAD!!
Yes, as I continue to vent my fustrations and spill more filth, I will allow my anger to have full control over me. I will not hate you but I just hate the FUCKING PEOPLE that are around you, poisoning you each day.
If I had a gun, they are the ones to waste. You are so noble to save the world but too bad I am not. You are a saint and I am the fallen angel...you were God sent and I'd guess it never would worked out from the start. It was just wishful thinking on my part right from the beginning.
I have feared for this day for so long and here it is, finally ending everything. I knew I was just hanging on a thin thread that would snap anytime. This was how fragile our relationship was. But at least you could still do whatever you wanted to and I had to wait for you to take a step before I could move mine. You've got your freedom back and now, let me just waste myself. I am beyond your control and I live my life the way I want it.
Thks for the memories.
FUCKED!
My intuition was correct, each time when you said that you wanted me to call you, I just felt uneasy that each call I make would probably be my last...and today, you decided to end it all. There is really nothing more I can say...all the things we've gone thru, the times we shared and the hopes that kept me alive.
You were my savior, my soul, my pillar of support. Now that you are gone, once again I have to pick up the broken pieces by myself. One after another, you chose to leave like she does and yet each time, I am the only one left to pick up the broken pieces. I was a puppet on your string right from the start, I was a chess piece on your table, I was nothing more than a number to add to your stats.
I kept so much of you and all that is now just ashes washed away with the rain. I was always walking behind you and you just kept running. I was never able to do what I wanted for you are always leading. I have loved and now I am tormented and burned! I cannot choose to hate you for I chose this path myself...and in isolation I drown myself in my own despair.
It was never about me...it was always about you. Whatever I do never seems to be able to please you and whatever you did I have to just accept it. I have become and option to you and you have become my only existence to go on.
How you took me out from the shadows and how you showed me to forgive and forget and to live life new, REBIRTH. How you used to promise me so much things and I was only a sucker to believe in faith and hope and all other lies. Seperated by a million miles and across oceans, I live each day on faith and hope only to find myself being buried in my own illusions. I can say enuffs thank you for all that you have done and showed me and I can say enuff sorries to make up for all the sadness that I gave you. But the truth is that I have given everything I've got and I mean EVERYTHING, but in the end, nothing ever pleases you. You are up there looking down and I am always here looking up at my ray of hope.
You gave me a reason to submit and repent but now you gave me nothing more than just empty promises. The world around me bless us for being together that's because I made you the center of my life and my world just revolves around you. But ask yourself what did you do for me? You can be stubborn and argue your way through but the truth is that you can NEVER put me above everything else, for you are self-centred and it's only you that matter. You have a choice and no one really held a knife to hold you against your own will and you chose to give me up. That's really noble and liked you always said, how much do I really know about you. Well ask yourself, how much did you ever tell me? You never wanted to tell me anything and excuses after excuses you would give to justify everything. Excuses like I would never be able to help or make a difference, I would never understand...these are jsut your own excuses to cover yourself. You are just plain selfish and no one ever will ever fit your bill.
It's not like I never ask or cared but it's just you that never really wanted to share. You made your options and priorities right from the start and I was never on the list. I was a substitute, a pawn, a replacement, something that when you needed, I will be at your disposal and stashed away when not needed. Have you ever been fair? The answer is no...not because nothing in this world is fair but rather it's just your own self-centred thinking.
I am sorry that I robbed you of your freedom right from the start.
I am sorry that I became the root of all your problems.
I am sorry that I wasn't able to meet your standards.
I am sorry that I was becoming a burden to you
I am sorry that I wasn't of much help
I am sorry that I was a jerk at some point of time
I am sorry that I disappoint you
I am sorry that I made you my life
I am sorry that I can not make your dreams come true
For all the sorries that I have apologised to you, have you ever said sorry to me? Have you ever felt remorse for the things that you did? I have never initiated any disputes or quarrels all these while and each time it was just me who would apologise to you. What were you realy thinking all these while?
So many questions are left blank and so many answers I seek, you were in a dilemma and you chose to sacrifice me so you could please the world and you really think that would benefit the both of us? I think that would only benefit you...so go on please the FUCKING WORLD of yours and let me burn and die.
Though I can never seek the answers why would you please the FUCKING WORLD and sacrifice me, if it makes you happy and if these FUCKING PEOPLE are so GOD DAMN FUCKING important, then so be it. I really don't see them contributing to your sake in anyway and I have to near the FUCKING CONSEQUENCES of your decisions, I can only come to think that THESE FUCKING ASSHOLES ARE BETTER OFF DEAD!!
Yes, as I continue to vent my fustrations and spill more filth, I will allow my anger to have full control over me. I will not hate you but I just hate the FUCKING PEOPLE that are around you, poisoning you each day.
If I had a gun, they are the ones to waste. You are so noble to save the world but too bad I am not. You are a saint and I am the fallen angel...you were God sent and I'd guess it never would worked out from the start. It was just wishful thinking on my part right from the beginning.
I have feared for this day for so long and here it is, finally ending everything. I knew I was just hanging on a thin thread that would snap anytime. This was how fragile our relationship was. But at least you could still do whatever you wanted to and I had to wait for you to take a step before I could move mine. You've got your freedom back and now, let me just waste myself. I am beyond your control and I live my life the way I want it.
Thks for the memories.
FUCKED!
Unravel the mystery of Whatever
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Okay I must really salute the marketing campaign of the new drink found locally using pseudonym WHATEVER and ANYTHING. Well let's just say that I've thought of actually coming out with a product be it food, toys or fashion where the element of surprise and uncertainty will draw in the crowd but it never set off due to lack of funding and therefore, it never really rationalize. So I really have to salute this company for rationalizing my visions.
But, soon the element of uncertainty wore off as I found a better place to place my dime. Look carefully on the ingredients of the WHATEVER drink and you will soon figure out that not all the cans have the same contents. As for the ANYTHING carbonated drink, hmm haven't really tried to unravel the mystery so if u did, pls update me then, meanwhile, support the local companies and go get yrself a can of ANYTHING.
Okay I must really salute the marketing campaign of the new drink found locally using pseudonym WHATEVER and ANYTHING. Well let's just say that I've thought of actually coming out with a product be it food, toys or fashion where the element of surprise and uncertainty will draw in the crowd but it never set off due to lack of funding and therefore, it never really rationalize. So I really have to salute this company for rationalizing my visions.
But, soon the element of uncertainty wore off as I found a better place to place my dime. Look carefully on the ingredients of the WHATEVER drink and you will soon figure out that not all the cans have the same contents. As for the ANYTHING carbonated drink, hmm haven't really tried to unravel the mystery so if u did, pls update me then, meanwhile, support the local companies and go get yrself a can of ANYTHING.
I am a FUCKING junkie
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
When the world smile and cheer, where was I?
When the world sleep and dream, where was I?
When everyone around me cheers, I went along
When everyone around me wept, I shed tears
When someone needed a shoulder to cry on, I was there
When someone needed a listening ear, I was there too
But when I drown myself in despair, no one was there
When I bled myself inside out, no one was there
And when I am gone, no one will care
And when I become nature, no one will remember
I never contributed anything to the world
I am just adding numbers to the world
I have no faith and no religion
I will let the Gods decide who to take me in
Harsh, cold and lost are what I feel each day
Deceit, lies and sacrifices are what I do each day
Ain't got no face of reality
Living behind a mask of eternity
Pills and capsules are my only consolation
Syringes and fluids are my existence
withdrawn into the path of destruction
I lead myself to isolation
When the world smile and cheer, where was I?
When the world sleep and dream, where was I?
When everyone around me cheers, I went along
When everyone around me wept, I shed tears
When someone needed a shoulder to cry on, I was there
When someone needed a listening ear, I was there too
But when I drown myself in despair, no one was there
When I bled myself inside out, no one was there
And when I am gone, no one will care
And when I become nature, no one will remember
I never contributed anything to the world
I am just adding numbers to the world
I have no faith and no religion
I will let the Gods decide who to take me in
Harsh, cold and lost are what I feel each day
Deceit, lies and sacrifices are what I do each day
Ain't got no face of reality
Living behind a mask of eternity
Pills and capsules are my only consolation
Syringes and fluids are my existence
withdrawn into the path of destruction
I lead myself to isolation
Tell me about it...
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Over the past few weekends, there are a series of events that are obviously telling me something and I have yet been able to interpret what they mean. Or is it that my time is near...or just plain pessimism? I don't know the answer...
Well, over the past couple of weekends, I have witnessed car crashes and I mean not a bump or scratch but those that involve mangled metals and ambulances. And just last Saturday, sometime around dawn, I saw a Ferrari F430 yes, it's a FUCKING that Ferrari crashed along CTE near Ang Mo Kio in the direction to Yishun. Skid marks on lane 1 indicated that the car probably hit the centre divider before spinning 4 lanes to the left. Mangled and flattened to the asphalt, wheels twisted, and debris all over a span of like 100m, the huge chassis look sturdy but ripped of all other layers of "skin". Didn't have a chance to see the driver or the car plate except that the car was maroon in color.
Well 1st tinme in my life I actually saw a Ferrari craashed on local roads and given the stability and precision aspect, it's probably boils down to the user error or misjudgement to turn a precision instrument of speed and innovation right down to scrap metal sitting in the junk yard.
Cool. Kudos to you Ferrari driver, for I wonder when will I ever have the chance like you to break the prancing horse into pieces and yet walk away to settle for another raging bull.
Over the past few weekends, there are a series of events that are obviously telling me something and I have yet been able to interpret what they mean. Or is it that my time is near...or just plain pessimism? I don't know the answer...
Well, over the past couple of weekends, I have witnessed car crashes and I mean not a bump or scratch but those that involve mangled metals and ambulances. And just last Saturday, sometime around dawn, I saw a Ferrari F430 yes, it's a FUCKING that Ferrari crashed along CTE near Ang Mo Kio in the direction to Yishun. Skid marks on lane 1 indicated that the car probably hit the centre divider before spinning 4 lanes to the left. Mangled and flattened to the asphalt, wheels twisted, and debris all over a span of like 100m, the huge chassis look sturdy but ripped of all other layers of "skin". Didn't have a chance to see the driver or the car plate except that the car was maroon in color.
Well 1st tinme in my life I actually saw a Ferrari craashed on local roads and given the stability and precision aspect, it's probably boils down to the user error or misjudgement to turn a precision instrument of speed and innovation right down to scrap metal sitting in the junk yard.
Cool. Kudos to you Ferrari driver, for I wonder when will I ever have the chance like you to break the prancing horse into pieces and yet walk away to settle for another raging bull.
Friday, June 08, 2007
Friend of many, foe of few...
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Since 1410, being used as a medicinal herb, tabacco have survived till today and it seems that many people can't seem to live without it, making it part of their needs. Be it considered a friend or foe, and the different ways to get the nicotine absorbed into the bloodstream, the various reasons people take it. Ultimately , being dependent on it in the long run seems to make tabacco a trusted aid and a friend that most would probably can't do without.
While I am not gonna write a full 700 page thesis on this sacred herb that seems to have been abuse and taken for granted these day, I would say that it's definitely a foe to a small minority who seems to find it rather negative than positive.
While I clearly remember those days suffering shits and serving my nation, out there cold, tired and listless in a God-forsaken island, only a small handful of us gathered and huff and puff little white cancer sticks in our trembling hands...chatted a while even though it's pure acquaintance. The feeling was mutual, sacred and beautiful where everyone became friends over a small chat with the universal bond that brought us, otherwise strangers together...cancer sticks.
It's funny but smoking alone, the tabacco and the nicotine would probably dislodge and displace one's mind before anything else but when with a group of trusted pals, or people who bears a strong relation, it's just pure bliss. Somehow a simple white cancer stick can bring strangers together and that sorta develops into friendship.
So that's about it for now and remember, a stick in hand goes well with a beer in the other...it's Friday so it's time to party.
Cheers
Since 1410, being used as a medicinal herb, tabacco have survived till today and it seems that many people can't seem to live without it, making it part of their needs. Be it considered a friend or foe, and the different ways to get the nicotine absorbed into the bloodstream, the various reasons people take it. Ultimately , being dependent on it in the long run seems to make tabacco a trusted aid and a friend that most would probably can't do without.
While I am not gonna write a full 700 page thesis on this sacred herb that seems to have been abuse and taken for granted these day, I would say that it's definitely a foe to a small minority who seems to find it rather negative than positive.
While I clearly remember those days suffering shits and serving my nation, out there cold, tired and listless in a God-forsaken island, only a small handful of us gathered and huff and puff little white cancer sticks in our trembling hands...chatted a while even though it's pure acquaintance. The feeling was mutual, sacred and beautiful where everyone became friends over a small chat with the universal bond that brought us, otherwise strangers together...cancer sticks.
It's funny but smoking alone, the tabacco and the nicotine would probably dislodge and displace one's mind before anything else but when with a group of trusted pals, or people who bears a strong relation, it's just pure bliss. Somehow a simple white cancer stick can bring strangers together and that sorta develops into friendship.
So that's about it for now and remember, a stick in hand goes well with a beer in the other...it's Friday so it's time to party.
Cheers
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Tritium For Sale
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
For those of you who know me or have seen me in clubs, I can be easily identified by a single tube of glowing green earring. Well now since I've got so many people asking me to bring in these cool gadgets, I am planning to ship in these "toys" again that is if I can have enuff orders. It comes in a pendant form but it's fully customizable to earrings, bracelet, etc. The light last approximately 10 years to a decade and DOES not require charging or whatsoever. The outer tube is made of glass and inside is a tritium vial. It's going for sale at SGD$45 a piece as they are imported from overseas. Colors available are Green, (Brightest), Blue (Really cool), White (What can I say more...), and Yellow (Unique color). Msg me the no. of pieces you want and color to shiroidevil@hotmail.com
"White compared to Blue"
For those of you who know me or have seen me in clubs, I can be easily identified by a single tube of glowing green earring. Well now since I've got so many people asking me to bring in these cool gadgets, I am planning to ship in these "toys" again that is if I can have enuff orders. It comes in a pendant form but it's fully customizable to earrings, bracelet, etc. The light last approximately 10 years to a decade and DOES not require charging or whatsoever. The outer tube is made of glass and inside is a tritium vial. It's going for sale at SGD$45 a piece as they are imported from overseas. Colors available are Green, (Brightest), Blue (Really cool), White (What can I say more...), and Yellow (Unique color). Msg me the no. of pieces you want and color to shiroidevil@hotmail.com
"White compared to Blue"
Monday, June 04, 2007
Silent Stalker
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
As the cold empty cage lies silent for a while, the hunter cleans the barrel, polishes the chamber and load in a fresh cartridge of rounds. He prepares to enter the wilderness to seek a prey. From days to weeks to months, nothing suitable to hunt, nothing caught his eye. But as time passes, solitude and calmness sets in. The hunter knows exactly what he wants, he lay in ambush silently awaiting for the rite moment. With his trusted weapon beside, the years of experience have seem to caught up with him. He will need to end the isolation of exile with a single prey.
Then on this day, the prey appeared ending all the waiting game. The hunter positions himself, looks into the scope and in the middle of the crosshair was a prey. With a single shot ringing through the silent forest, the prey fell. The hunter have caught his prey, and the very next day, he tests it to see if it's suitable and on the third day, he makes his "kill".
The cage has once again come alive with it's existence.
As the cold empty cage lies silent for a while, the hunter cleans the barrel, polishes the chamber and load in a fresh cartridge of rounds. He prepares to enter the wilderness to seek a prey. From days to weeks to months, nothing suitable to hunt, nothing caught his eye. But as time passes, solitude and calmness sets in. The hunter knows exactly what he wants, he lay in ambush silently awaiting for the rite moment. With his trusted weapon beside, the years of experience have seem to caught up with him. He will need to end the isolation of exile with a single prey.
Then on this day, the prey appeared ending all the waiting game. The hunter positions himself, looks into the scope and in the middle of the crosshair was a prey. With a single shot ringing through the silent forest, the prey fell. The hunter have caught his prey, and the very next day, he tests it to see if it's suitable and on the third day, he makes his "kill".
The cage has once again come alive with it's existence.
Friday, June 01, 2007
Greed Vs Needs
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
There is definitely one hell of a difference between Greed and Needs. While needs are basic necessities that must be fulfilled before greed can set in. The hierarchy is formed in such a way that needs are at the base of the pyramid while greed can be anything above the needs category or even right at the tip of the pyramid.
I am using this frame of reference to make sense of something. On one hand, someone that I have hurt, left high and dry am still willing to sacrifice anything for me in exchange for my happiness. Almost a year since the fateful day and still I am being treated like a gem, simple words or msg seems to put a smile on her face and make her day.
While on the other hand, I was born greedy and I'd guess who wasn't. I am a perfectionist and I seek the perfect one who I know in reality will never exist as I will continue to find fault and flaws. So somehow I've indeed found what I am looking for but it seems like it's really not easy maintaining the relationship. Once I was papmered like a King and whatever I wanted, she would yield and submit to my requests. I never really needed to care or let anything bother me as I know she would give in. Now that I have traded those days for something very different or rather the opposite. Now I am the one that's giving everthing I've got and just hanging on a thin line of hope. I have inevitably become a pawn, a slave of my own device. I am being leashed on a chain and I've lost my freedom, my empire and everything I've got. But still I keep my hopes high and I hang on dearly to uncertainty believing that someday it'd rationalize into reality.
It's really ridiculous how I yearned so much for something and fought so hard for it only to crumble and hold on dearly to a thin line that will either snap and let me fly to God's santuary or will it allow me to climb right to the top and save myself? Although there is absolutely no way I can know the answer but I really want it to be like those in my dreams. The flow here is like a circuit, one direction and I am just like a wet cell requiring 2 opposing nodes to connect the circuit.
Well like ehat everyone would probably say, that's life so you gotta just accept it. Yeah I will accept it but in the meantime, I just hope that I can sleep normally and wake up normally without the constant rising aggression in me.
It's like a drug now, I needed them badly but I am picky for I don't just take any drug, I seek designer drugs, yep those that can make me feel good and yet they look good.
And besides, I am quite fed up with my job after my Boss gave me a good thrashing down last week for things that was not within my control. And his stubborn ass won't listen to anything but himself. It's tough these day struggling to go work which was a huge contrast from the start where I had a FUCKING huge enthusiasm to work. And I just pray that my saviour will understand me and be more tolerant of my childish antics and tantrums. Because I really do not want to feel that I have made a wrong judgement and regret my decisions.
God Bless
There is definitely one hell of a difference between Greed and Needs. While needs are basic necessities that must be fulfilled before greed can set in. The hierarchy is formed in such a way that needs are at the base of the pyramid while greed can be anything above the needs category or even right at the tip of the pyramid.
I am using this frame of reference to make sense of something. On one hand, someone that I have hurt, left high and dry am still willing to sacrifice anything for me in exchange for my happiness. Almost a year since the fateful day and still I am being treated like a gem, simple words or msg seems to put a smile on her face and make her day.
While on the other hand, I was born greedy and I'd guess who wasn't. I am a perfectionist and I seek the perfect one who I know in reality will never exist as I will continue to find fault and flaws. So somehow I've indeed found what I am looking for but it seems like it's really not easy maintaining the relationship. Once I was papmered like a King and whatever I wanted, she would yield and submit to my requests. I never really needed to care or let anything bother me as I know she would give in. Now that I have traded those days for something very different or rather the opposite. Now I am the one that's giving everthing I've got and just hanging on a thin line of hope. I have inevitably become a pawn, a slave of my own device. I am being leashed on a chain and I've lost my freedom, my empire and everything I've got. But still I keep my hopes high and I hang on dearly to uncertainty believing that someday it'd rationalize into reality.
It's really ridiculous how I yearned so much for something and fought so hard for it only to crumble and hold on dearly to a thin line that will either snap and let me fly to God's santuary or will it allow me to climb right to the top and save myself? Although there is absolutely no way I can know the answer but I really want it to be like those in my dreams. The flow here is like a circuit, one direction and I am just like a wet cell requiring 2 opposing nodes to connect the circuit.
Well like ehat everyone would probably say, that's life so you gotta just accept it. Yeah I will accept it but in the meantime, I just hope that I can sleep normally and wake up normally without the constant rising aggression in me.
It's like a drug now, I needed them badly but I am picky for I don't just take any drug, I seek designer drugs, yep those that can make me feel good and yet they look good.
And besides, I am quite fed up with my job after my Boss gave me a good thrashing down last week for things that was not within my control. And his stubborn ass won't listen to anything but himself. It's tough these day struggling to go work which was a huge contrast from the start where I had a FUCKING huge enthusiasm to work. And I just pray that my saviour will understand me and be more tolerant of my childish antics and tantrums. Because I really do not want to feel that I have made a wrong judgement and regret my decisions.
God Bless
Forza MotorSports 2
- Fate is decided by God but destiny is the path you choose to get there -
Oh well today's Friday again and tomolo is the weekend. Went to Clinic yesterday for some free parties but the crowd there was a bit of a disappointing. Felt a bit too old for the crowd there and a bit outta place as well but it's was generally a ok experience and it's not that I haven't been to Clinic before.
On Tuesday nite, went down to Zouk with my bro Lawrence to chill but it's was FUCKING packed. Had a bumper to bumper situation as I won't allow any other cars to cut my lane as I drove to the slip road to Zouk. A hot babe wanted to walk in front of my car to cross the road and I was like trying to prevent other cars from coming into my lane and so the gap between my front bumper to the ass of the car in front was so FUCKING close. The hot babe gave me a sarcastic thumbs up like "You're GOOD! FUCKING GOOD!" for like preventing her from crossing in front my car and also damn FUCKING close to the car in front without hitting it. Well, Lawrence was laughing like a idiot in the car and I swear I was behaving like a asshole too. FUCKING hilarious...me and Law's combo's like a kick as duo out to get laid! Ha.
And yesterday nite after the Clinic, I headed back home as I still had to fucking drag my ass to work today. But on the journey home, a cab pulled up beside me and this hottie gave me some lustful gesture and her FUCKING boyfriend was just sitting next to her unaware of it. It was like a 2 min stint of lustful and playful gesture between me and her. She was like sucking her fingers seductively and I was like blowing her flying kisses. Boy that 2 min was God sent...haha what a nite, what a hottie...She's hot and I mean real hot...
Okay back to the topic now, tried Forza MotorSports 2 (FM2) on X360 with a HDTV. Graphics really brought out the realism of racing games, FUCKING GOOD! Gameplay was awesome as well, started of with a FC3S RX-7 as I am a suker for Japanese cars. The handling of the car feels like the real shit thing, fishtails, powersildes, oversteers, you name it. Hard learning curve to master the drifts but definitely worth it if you don't actually have the real car. It feels just like the real thing. Had a bit of upgrades here and there but not too much. Blasted the saved credits on a EVO 9 GT, tried a couple of races and unlocked a EVO 8 MR and some Limited Edt Integra Type R and also a AE86 Trueno. Too bad they didn't have RS Watanabe for the 86 and the stock one sucks big time so I will skip the 86 for the moment. Desprately beefing up the EVO 8 MR now to complete more races and to unlock more goodies. Great car simulation game that will keep your lard ass glued for hours. Didn't really liked ShadowRun after I tested it. I go a lot for storyline in a game rather than aimless, redundant killings and shits that pit skills.
So there you have it, my Friday's entry.
Oh well today's Friday again and tomolo is the weekend. Went to Clinic yesterday for some free parties but the crowd there was a bit of a disappointing. Felt a bit too old for the crowd there and a bit outta place as well but it's was generally a ok experience and it's not that I haven't been to Clinic before.
On Tuesday nite, went down to Zouk with my bro Lawrence to chill but it's was FUCKING packed. Had a bumper to bumper situation as I won't allow any other cars to cut my lane as I drove to the slip road to Zouk. A hot babe wanted to walk in front of my car to cross the road and I was like trying to prevent other cars from coming into my lane and so the gap between my front bumper to the ass of the car in front was so FUCKING close. The hot babe gave me a sarcastic thumbs up like "You're GOOD! FUCKING GOOD!" for like preventing her from crossing in front my car and also damn FUCKING close to the car in front without hitting it. Well, Lawrence was laughing like a idiot in the car and I swear I was behaving like a asshole too. FUCKING hilarious...me and Law's combo's like a kick as duo out to get laid! Ha.
And yesterday nite after the Clinic, I headed back home as I still had to fucking drag my ass to work today. But on the journey home, a cab pulled up beside me and this hottie gave me some lustful gesture and her FUCKING boyfriend was just sitting next to her unaware of it. It was like a 2 min stint of lustful and playful gesture between me and her. She was like sucking her fingers seductively and I was like blowing her flying kisses. Boy that 2 min was God sent...haha what a nite, what a hottie...She's hot and I mean real hot...
Okay back to the topic now, tried Forza MotorSports 2 (FM2) on X360 with a HDTV. Graphics really brought out the realism of racing games, FUCKING GOOD! Gameplay was awesome as well, started of with a FC3S RX-7 as I am a suker for Japanese cars. The handling of the car feels like the real shit thing, fishtails, powersildes, oversteers, you name it. Hard learning curve to master the drifts but definitely worth it if you don't actually have the real car. It feels just like the real thing. Had a bit of upgrades here and there but not too much. Blasted the saved credits on a EVO 9 GT, tried a couple of races and unlocked a EVO 8 MR and some Limited Edt Integra Type R and also a AE86 Trueno. Too bad they didn't have RS Watanabe for the 86 and the stock one sucks big time so I will skip the 86 for the moment. Desprately beefing up the EVO 8 MR now to complete more races and to unlock more goodies. Great car simulation game that will keep your lard ass glued for hours. Didn't really liked ShadowRun after I tested it. I go a lot for storyline in a game rather than aimless, redundant killings and shits that pit skills.
So there you have it, my Friday's entry.
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